If you are reading this article then chances are, you are in a not so unique situation of trying to fish through tons of articles just to figure out if a court would ever give custody to a father. The quick answer is yes, and it is much more common than you think.
I should preface this by saying this article is written by a father who went through a custody battle and has had full custody for almost five years at this point. I get along great with her mother but it was accepted that she is in a much better situation with me.
When I was first put in a situation where it was no longer appropriate for shared custody I was met by a bunch of people saying “ you are fighting a losing battle”, “A judge would never give full custody to a father”. Hearing that did not stop any of the drive I had to get full custody which at that point, was necessary. I am aware that not all judges are fair, and not everyone is as lucky as me but the hard truth is that a father can do just as well raising a child. There is always going to be a void to try and fill but we can only do our best.
Many are under the assumption that a father does not have as many parental instincts. Of course that is fair to say since we do not carry a baby for nine months. At the same time, there are those that are born to be parents with or without a partner. I also believe that both parents should be in a child’s life for as long as possible.
In the end it is really not about the parents but the mental, and physical well being of the child. You child has a whole new landscape to figure out which is not fair for anyone but it is the realities of life.
How I Did it
The first thing I did after leaving was retain a lawyer to start the court process right away. Everything that was texted, as well as pictures and calls were kept. You should assume that it is being done to you as well as to prevent anything bad from coming out in court.
Now You Have Custody. How long will it last?
You just won custody and now you are wondering if this is permanent. No, it is not permanent at all unless parental rights are signed over. The mother can appeal as many times as she would like, and courts want both parents in a child’s life when possible, so eventually you will lose it if she is aware of all this. If she cannot afford a lawyer then you may be able to get away with a lot more than the typical person.
Overall, it is all about our children and preserving as much normalcy as possible. They didn’t ask for us make a baby. That was our choice, and now it is our responsibility to do everything in our power to create a life that was better than ours for our children.
The process can be painful but you will learn a lot about yourself. When times are overwhelming remember to take a step back and think about any good things that happen on a daily basis you tend to brush off like finding that extra k-cup in the box when you thought you would run out.
